Thursday, December 31, 2009
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
I feel like a parent who abanded their child
Or one who has selected a favorite child
...and it wasn't you.
I've jumped on the bandwagon
a bandwagon called Facebook
I've been bedazzled by BeJeweled
...I'm just not that into you.
I've moved past this blog
to a place where I Twitter
and see lots of Tweets
oh wait...my Tweets are here too!
Please forgive my inattentiveness
I promise I'll change
Isn't the first step
Admitting my problem?
Friday, September 11, 2009
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Friday, August 7, 2009
Unfortunately she missed her pre-arranged & prepaid ride to the airport.
Fortunately she was able to call a cab.
Unfortunately she had to pay for the cab.
Fortunately she had some money.
Unfortunately she went to the wrong airline counter to check in.
Fortunately she found the right airline counter.
Unfortunately she was too late to catch her flight.
Fortunately the airline was able to book her on another flight.
Unfortunately she has to wait a whole day to fly out.
Fortunately she is able to stay 1 more night with the same lady she boarded with.
Unfortunately she needs a lot more money to pay for the additional charges to chang her ticket.
Fortunately she can call mom & dad.
Unfortunately this means mom needs to get to the bank this morning.
Fortunately mom & dad have an emergency fund and can get her the money.
Unfortunately our son has his final T-ball game at noon so we have to be ready to head over there after doing the banking…and we can’t find his glove.
Fortunately we called dad who found it in his truck.
Unfortunately we now have to drive across town to pick it up.
Fortunately we have time (barely) to do this.
Unfortunately my van won’t start!
Fortunately we have an extra vehicle.
Unfortunately I don’t have a key to that vehicle.
Fortunately my oldest daughter is living at home and has a vehicle that I can borrow.
Unfortunately this leaves her without a vehicle.
Fortunately we were able to quickly get our banking done and head over to pick up the t-ball glove. Dad said he’d leave the truck unlocked.
Unfortunately he left the keys in the door of the truck!
Fortunately the truck, keys and the glove are all still there.
Unfortunately I have to interrupt dad’s meeting to return his keys to him.
Fortunately we make it to the game in time.
Unfortunately I still have to change my daughter’s ticket home from Sunday to Monday.
Fortunately I can find my ticket information with the phone number to call to make changes.
Unfortunately it sounds like my call ended up in a foreign country.
Fortunately I’m pretty used to listening to accents.
Unfortunately it’s going to cost quite a bit to change this flight.
Fortunately the person at the other end suggests I simply cancel the flight and received a credit to be used later…and then book a completely new flight.
Unfortunately I can’t find a cheap ticket into our town. I end up buying one an hour’s drive away. Half the price.
Fortunately I think all the flight rescheduling is finished. I forward the flight confirmation to my daughter.
Unfortunately my daughter did not forward her new flight information to me so I have no idea when she’s supposed to be back in the States.
Fortunately she calls home Sunday night to let us know she’s at her cousin’s house. Yippie!
Unfortunately she can’t read the email with her next flight information.
Fortunately I can just email the information to her.
Unfortunately she doesn’t call me to let me know she’s made her flight. But, we figure no news is good news.
Fortunately I have time to get home from work and put together the Lasagna she requested for dinner.
Unfortunately it’s not finished before we have to head out of town to pick her up. Hope her dad remembers to turn the oven off!
Fortunately the trip to pick her up goes well. She arrives. All of her luggage arrives. We have a safe trip home. The lasagna is perfect and still warm.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
I'll be waiting for your own pics!
Friday, July 31, 2009
Just moved to
Really heating up. Got up to 100 today. Not a problem. I live in an air-conditioned home and drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a sun worshipper.
Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing the lawn for me. Another scorcher today, but I love it here.
The temperature hasn't been below 100 this week. How do people get use to this kind of heat? At least, it's kind of windy though. But getting use to the heat is taking longer than I expected.
Fell asleep by the community pool. (Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my body). Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.
The wind sucks. It feels like a giant freaking blow dryer!!! And it's hot as hell! The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and the AC repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts.
Been sleeping outside on the patio for 3 nights now, $225,000 house and I can't even go inside.
It's 115 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today. It cost $500 and gets the temperature down to 85. I hate this stupid state.
If another wise ass cracks, 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm going to strangle him. Damn heat. By the time I get to work, the radiator is boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like baked cat!
Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts and when I sat on the seat of the car, I thought my ass was on fire. My skin melted to the seat. I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and ass... Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried ass and baked cat.
The weather report might as well be a dumb recording. Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to breath much less try to do anything for 2 blasted months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain in this damn state? Water rationing will be next, so my $1700 worth of cactus will just dry up and blow over. Even the cactus can't live in this wretched heat.
Welcome to HELL! Temperature got to 115 again today. Cactus are dead. Forgot to crack the window and blew the windshield out of the car. The installer came to fix it and guess what he asked me??? 'Hot enough for you today?' My sister had to spend $1,500 to bail me out of jail. Freaking
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
- who has that much time on their hands?
- not to mention who has that much yarn? OK, this I actually do understand - it's called MY STASH!
- how did they get this tree to stand still for a fitting?
- how to get this over/on those top branches????
- what kind of yarn is this?
- how many times did they have to redo a section because the fit was all wrong?
- did they check their guage?
Monday, July 27, 2009
Friday, July 24, 2009
Monday, July 20, 2009
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Friday, July 10, 2009
Monday, July 6, 2009
Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading towards 70!
Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
No one expects you to run--anywhere.
People call at 9 pm and ask, did I wake you?
People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
Things you buy now won't wear out.
You can eat supper at 4 pm.
You can live without sex but not your glasses.
You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks
into the room.
You sing along with elevator music.
Your eyes won't get much worse.
Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.
You can't remember who sent you this list.
And you notice these are all in Big Print for your convenience.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
My poor friend though. We were holding the sale at the home of her husband's aunt.
Thursday...when they got there Thursday morning, the Aunt was feeling very poorly. Friend's DH took her to the ER...her blood pressure was extremely high. Of course, Wednesday was the hottest day of the year so far and there is no air conditioning in the house. After getting her taken care of at the ER, he brought her back home...where she slept most of the day. We carried on with the sale.
Friday morning...when I arrived, my friend was calling the doctor's office as the aunt was feeling poorly again. DH took to in and got her taken care of again. Did I mention this lady is 92? Brought her back home...made sure she was eating and drinking. All looked good.
Friday late afternoon...we were starting to pack up when the aunt told my friend that her doctor's office had called and wanted her to go in to the ER for some tests...and we were like "they called at 6???" My friend went in to call the doctor's office - they were closed. She called the ER and they didn't know anything about it. She figured she'd call the doctor's office back in the morning and find out more. We went back to packing up. A couple of minutes later, we hear a siren. I joked "I hope your aunt didn't call 911!" The siren got closer and closer and by the time we could see it, it was slowing down....and turning into our drive!! Goodness!
Long story short: I still don't know much of the details of how that ambulance was called - my friend ended up scooting right out to take her aunt to the ER...I finished packing up the garage sale and headed home. All I know right now is that they are all OK this morning and I'm tired!
Oh, I did get a rock tumbler for myself at the sale!!!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Monday, June 15, 2009
Poke and prod the spider with your mouse. Also 'grab' one of its legs with your mouse and drag it around the screen -- tell me it's not alive!
And, anywhere on the map, you can hit the space bar. It leaves little bugs where your mouse it - watch the spider go after them. Crazy or creepy?
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Are you male or female?
To find the answer, look down.
LOOK down , not SCROLL down !
YOU SCROLLED DOWN, DIDN'T YOU?
Monday, June 8, 2009
1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.
3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South , plus a couple no one's seen before.
4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha..
5. 'Onced' and 'Twiced' are words.
6. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!
7. 'Jaw-P?' means 'Did ya'll go to the bathroom?'
8. People actually grow and eat okra.
9. 'Fixinto' is one word.
10. There is no such thing as 'lunch'. There is only dinner and then there is supper.
11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar.
12. Backwards and forwards means 'I know everything about you.'
13. The word 'jeet' is actually a phrase meaning 'Did you eat?'
14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see...
15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH EM.
16. 'No. Jew?' is a common response to the question 'Did you bring any beer?'
17. You measure distance in minutes.
18. You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
19. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
20. You know what a 'DAWG' is.
21. You carry jumper cables in your car --- for your OWN car.
22. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Tony's,
23. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports and motor sports, and gossip.
24. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
25. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit 'a bit warm'.
26. You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas..
27. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past time known as 'goin' Wal-Martin' or 'off to Wally World'.
28. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chicken stew weather.
29. Fried catfish is the other white meat.
30. We don't need no dang driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive dag-nabbit.
1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
Friday, June 5, 2009
1. Soak stained hankies in salt water before washing.
2. Sprinkle salt on your shelves to keep ants away.
3. Soak fish in salt water before de scaling; the scales will come off easier.
4. Put a few grains of rice in your salt shaker for easier pouring.
5. Add salt to green salads to prevent wilting.
6. Test the freshness of eggs in a cup of salt water; fresh eggs sink; bad ones float.
7. Add a little salt to your boiling water when cooking eggs; a cracked egg will stay in its shell this way.
8. A tiny pinch of salt with egg whites makes them beat up fluffier.
9. Soak wrinkled apples in a mildly salted water solution to perk them up.
10. Rub salt on your pancake griddle and your flapjacks won't stick.
11. Soak toothbrushes in salt water before you first use them; they will last longer.
12.. Use salt to clean your discolored coffee pot.
13. Mix salt with turpentine to whiten you bathtub and toilet bowl.
14. Soak your nuts,HUH, in salt brine overnight and they will crack out of their shells whole. Just tap the end of the shell with a hammer to break it open easily.
15. Boil clothespins in salt water before using them and they will last longer.
16. Clean brass, copper and pewter with paste made of salt and vinegar, thickened with flour
17. Add a little salt to the water your cut flowers will stand in for a longer life.
18. Pour a mound of salt on an ink spot on your carpet; let the salt soak up the stain.
19. Clean your iron by rubbing some salt on the damp cloth on the ironing surface.
20. Adding a little salt to the water when cooking foods in a double boiler will make the food cook faster.
21. Use a mixture of salt and lemon juice to clean piano keys.
22. To fill plaster holes in your walls, use equal parts of salt and starch, with just enough water to make a stiff putty.
23. Rinse a sore eye with a little salt water.
24. Mildly salted water makes an effective mouthwash. Use it hot for a sore throat gargle.
25. Dry salt sprinkled on your toothbrush makes a good tooth polisher.
26. Use salt for killing weeds in your lawn.
27. Eliminate excess suds with a sprinkle of salt.
28. A dash of salt in warm milk makes a more relaxing beverage.
29. Before using new glasses, soak them in warm salty water for awhile.
30. A dash of salt enhances the taste of tea.
31. Salt improves the taste of cooking apples.
32. Soak your clothes line in salt water to prevent your clothes from freezing to the line; likewise, use salt in your final rinse to prevent the clothes from freezing.
33. Rub any wicker furniture you may have with salt water to prevent yellowing.
34. Freshen sponges by soaking them in salt water.
35. Add raw potatoes to stews and soups that are too salty.
36. Soak enamel pans in salt water overnight and boil salt water in them next day to remove burned-on stains.
37. Clean your greens in salt water for easier removal of dirt.
38. Gelatin sets more quickly when a dash of salt is added.
39. Fruits put in mildly salted water after peeling will not discolor.
40. Fabric colors hold fast in salty water wash.
41. Milk stays fresh longer when a little salt is added.
42. Use equal parts of salt and soda for brushing your teeth.
43. Sprinkle salt in your oven before scrubbing clean.
44. Soaked discolored glass in a salt and vinegar solution to remove stains.
45. Clean greasy pans with a paper towel and salt.
46. Salty water boils faster when cooking eggs.
47. Add a pinch of salt to whipping cream to make it whip more quickly.
48. Sprinkle salt in milk-scorched pans to remove odor.
49. A dash of salt improves the taste of coffee.
50. Boil mismatched hose in salty water and they will come out matched.
51. Salt and soda will sweeten the odor of your refrigerator.
52. Cover wine-stained fabric with salt; rinse in cool water later.
53. Remove offensive odors from stove with salt and cinnamon.
54. A pinch of salt improves the flavor of cocoa.
55. To remove grease stains in clothing, mix one part salt to four parts rubbing alcohol.
56. Salt and lemon juice removes mildew.
57. Sprinkle salt between sidewalk bricks where you don't want grass growing.
58. Polish your old kerosene lamp with salt for a brighter look.
59.. Remove odors from sink drainpipes with a strong, hot solution of salt water.
60. If a pie bubbles over in your oven, put a handful of salt on top of the spilled juice The mess won't smell and will bake into a dry, light crust which will wipe off easily when the oven has cooled.
Monday, May 4, 2009
I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, 'If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?'
'No, I had to stop drinking years ago', the homeless woman told me.
'Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?' I asked.
'No, I don't waste time shopping,' the homeless woman said. 'I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.'
'Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?' I asked.
'Are you NUTS!' replied the homeless woman. I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!'
'Well, I said, 'I'm not going to give you the money.. Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight.'
The homeless Woman was shocked. 'Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.'
I said, 'That's okay. It's important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine.'
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Saturday, April 4, 2009
I sharpened the picture, added some color to the background, changed the edges and added my shop name. What do you think? Are you more likely to click on the before or after picture?
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
April Fools Day is here again. I'm not the kind who typically plays practical jokes on family & friends. Well, not too often! I have one sister who is able to pull off fantstic jokes - usually at her husband's expense.
For example, one year she went to the grocery store, bought a portabello mushroom and gently placed it in her front yard. When her husband came home from work, she made some excuse about going outside and made sure he saw her "find" said mushroom. She made a big deal of "picking" it, and as she was trying to bring it into the house, he was at the door blocking her way! She was telling him that since they were having burgers for dinner anyway, she would add this mushroom. He's going nuts, exclaiming that it could be poisonous! She finally 'fessed up and admitted she bought it at the grocery store.
Another year, she "soiled" the toilet in his bathroom with a brownie...and left it looking that way. He has a sensative stomach and was very upset when he saw that and nearly lost his lunch. I don't think he was much happier when she told him it was only a brownie!
I have to admit, I did get her one time...not on April Fools Day though. We were sharing an apartment and working different shifts. While she was at work on 2nd shift, I was involved in an accident and totaled my car. Had it towed back to our apartment. Called her to see if I could borrow her car the next morning to go to work because "I had a flat tire". Well, techinically, it was true - my tire was flat! Oh, that passenger side door that is now INSIDE the car - yea, that's not good either. She wasn't too happy with me, but happy that I was fine.
So...what are you doing tomorrow?